Hello Alone

I sent the first six chapters of my novel to a woman I had Creative Writing class with. I felt like she would be honest with me and be constructive with her criticism (unlike Critic Boy...). She has yet to get back to me with what she thought but she did send me a message on facebook saying that she isn't completely finished yet but what she has read is and I quote: "Amazing." I'm not quite sure what that means but..I'll take it. It's better than what Critic Boy would say, I'm sure. I would hate to know what he would say. Probably something cynical and sarcastic because that's just how he is. I've learned to just take what he says with a grain of salt because it's not worth getting upset over. We all have our critics, right? And if I want to make this writing a profession and be successful about it, I need to learn to deal with the critics. That's just life.

I haven't really written in awhile though. I've come across yet another case of writer's block. I just can't get my head to focus with all the stress that I've been experiencing. If it isn't about friends, it's about family. I went out for a weekend with friends last weekend, and I came home only to be verbally attacked by my step dad while my mom was in the grocery store buying him yet another pack of cigarettes. This is what he said:

"Do you realize that everything you do, but breathe, costs people money?"

I didn't say anything.

He said: "And do you realize you've wasted half your life doing nothing?"

At this point, I became very upset and told him that that wasn't true and he really needed to learn how to count. I told him I can't get a job if there are no jobs out there.

He's just so frustrating. I don't know how much more I can take without having a complete nervous breakdown. This is why I can't write. Because I have no support. I know that's probably not true at all but I just don't hear it anymore. All I need is for you to ask me how my writing is going and such. That's it.