I am my own worst enemy.

The pivotal first entry of my post college life. Write it down, folks. This should get interesting.

I had a livejournal account, but looking back on it, it felt so..old. Like the old me. I feel different nowadays. Like a true, honest adult. One who doesn't have school to go back to in the fall. I'm done with that. I have cleansed my hands of that drama.

Yet, here comes all that drama that everyone else has talked about. The hard economic times have come to slap me straight in the face. Hard. Why? Because, folks, I have recently graduated college. Yes, in the worst economic times ever. Congratulations, right? Thanks..

Here comes the anxiety of struggling to find a job. To prove that you are better than any other unemployed person desperate to earn money and pay off vast amounts of college loans. It's like a hardcore fist fight to come out on top. And I am not succeeding.

Yet another why? Because all who are hiring want experience. More than three years+ experience. That frustrates me. How am I supposed to get experience when no one will hire me to get that experience? Does that make sense to you? No. It does not. So here I am, sitting in my mom and step-dad's house, unemployed and feeling stressed out. Feeling worthless.

I only graduated almost a month ago. So why am I feeling so stressed out? Like there is no hope of ever finding a job? I don't know. Might be that anxiety disorder I have.

When I was a freshman in college, I had this dream of when I graduated college (finally), some amazing job would fall into my lap that day. I would move away to the west coast to a big city and be so successful. In reality, that hasn't happened yet.

I'm trying to stay optimistic.